secrets to a long lasting relationship

The Power of Two – Secrets to a Long-Lasting Relationship

Experiencing issues in your relationship is inevitable – any partnership will have its ups and downs. What counts is how you deal with these problems together. The good news is, there are many strategies that you can implement to help improve your relationship and get it back on track.

Here are a few secrets to a long-lasting relationship. These tips can help you avoid disputes and see your relationship flourish:

Be a team

A different view on tidiness, money, or even parenting may seem impossible to overcome. But remember, the least helpful approach is to blame each other and fight it out. Instead, why not try to approach the problem as the two of you, united together against the issue at hand. For example, you could ask the following ‘how can we work together to better budget our money’ or ‘what can we do to help us argue less’.


For any relationship to work, we need to put ourselves in the shoes of the other person. We must do our best to understand their perspective on things, their thoughts, and feelings. While it’s important that you balance your own needs with that of your mates, where possible, try to look for compromises that you can both make when it comes to a disagreement.

Meet your personal goals

Be open and honest with your partner about your, goals, desires, and needs – and encourage them to be open and honest with you too. If you don’t, you run the risk of building up frustration and resentment which could eventually stand in the way of a long-lasting and happy relationship.


Trust is vital to a healthy relationship in so many ways. One reason why, is that when you fully trust your partner, you are confident that you are their top priority and they always have your best interests at heart. So, when any difficulties or challenges come along in your relationship, you have confidence that you can overcome these issues together. There are ways you can build up your trust in each other, such as being open, sharing secrets, and being willing to compromise.


Respect helps create trust in your relationship. Always show respect for your partner’s family and friends as well as their opinions and decisions, even if you disagree with them. When you are having a dispute, be careful with your choice of words. It can be all too easy to hurl hurtful comments at each other. Instead, relearn the ability to discuss important matters with goodwill – after all, one of the least productive ways to solve an issue is to prove each other wrong!

Demonstrate your love

We all want to feel loved and appreciated, and your mate is no different. It’s so important to regularly remind your partner how grateful you are for everything they do for you – even the little things. Always make time to demonstrate your care for them and don’t forget to tell them how loved and treasured they are as much as possible. Why not make it a habit to surprise your partner with love notes, unexpected date nights, and thoughtful gifts?

Create memories

Nothing will bring you closer than spending quality time together, creating memories. Whether you dance, exercise, horse ride, or travel together – do what you both find exciting on a regular basis. Get out of your rut – watching TV night after night will unlikely become a happy memory that you both look back on in years to come.

Check-in regularly

You don’t have to wait until you hit a bump to check in with the other person. Make time to discuss your relationship together and see what improvements can be made. During this time, you could discuss what you appreciated most about each other over the last 4 weeks and then chat about any improvements you could both make together. Or, you could make it your goal at bedtime to share your three best memories from the day and what you are most grateful for.

Here are a few secrets to a long-lasting relationship. These tips can help you avoid disputes and see your relationship flourish:

Secrets to a long-lasting relationship – does that mean couples therapy?

While the above secrets to a long-lasting relationship are worth applying, sometimes, a little extra help is needed to get your relationship back on track. Many couples turn to therapy to overcome certain issues and strengthen their relationship for years to come.

If you are looking for relationship counselling, whether as a couple or individually, Positive Mind Works can help. We have a team of experienced psychologists who offer couples counselling using a variety of approaches. We work with you to rekindle happy feelings, improve communication and resolve conflicts. Click here to learn more.

Robin Watts

Robin Watts
NZ Registered Psychologist

Experienced in relationship therapy


Mauro Vieira
AUS Registered Psychologist

Experienced in relationship therapy

Naomi Carleton

Naomi Carleton
AU & NZ Registered Psychologist

Experienced in relationship therapy

Click here to book your couples counselling session



Take a look at our other topical blog posts here:


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *